I used to have some internet friends, it was such a wholesome part of my middle life. I miss it. And I am seeking long lost friends, I thought I would try the most likely place to be seen. Nexopia. Where there are thousands of blogs to read <\3. I guess it’s similar to when I watch a thriller. My brain is so tuned in and riveted. I can not sleep. So I must not watch too late in the day. Same goes for last night when I shot up at 12mid night all might wondering, “do I still have a nexopia account????!!!!” I did not, unfortunately instead of request password to a long lost email. I requested a delete. Oops. Naturally upon arrival I went down a little rabbit hole.
I find these days I’m too sensitive to be on devices much. I usually end up journalling.
What do other people experience when they are feeling a lot and turn on a device? (Or I could be too high to watch tv but not too high to journal. Idk .) Sometimes I can’t turn my brain off and it just needs to feel the world, I have choice now though. Ironically I am at the best mental state I mustered. For what is going on . I find weed helps me get in touch with my feelings. But I was expecting to get high and watch and laugh mao at “love is blind.” Such curveballs life can throw. I can barely turn my computer on these days.
I have a lot talk about. And I have turned to writing and thinking instead. Today I was out spoken, but I am very shy, and very unpredictable in my momentum for opening up. Yet it is what I have always wanted, I am just the most shy introverted extrovert in existence. I dearly love being around people and talking. People take me out of my mind library. I am content with being in my mind library forever, how eva. But I am slowly getting comfortable with my writing and thinking reaching “public places.” And, hey at least a forum has communication potential!!
-love locked box